Episode 284 : Even More Strange Things

It’s been three weeks since we got together, so there is a ton of catch up. Also, Tony talks about porn for a while, because of course he does. Video games, books, movies, TV, the usual. Oh, and we define love. Enjoy!


What roles do love and physical affection play in your life. –Cawfee

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8 Responses to Episode 284 : Even More Strange Things

  1. William says:

    Wow… that conversation about physical affection was awkward.


    We just don’t talk about such things where I’m from. Not out of embarrassment or shame, but out of respect to the parties who aren’t present. One cannot talk about physical affection without taking about physical relationships, and if the other parties in said relationships aren’t present… well, it becomes nigh impossible to speak of those relationships without speaking on behalf of the absent person, which, where I come from, is regarded as impolite.

    I ought to have simply begged off the conversation, but I thought I could maybe be clever or subtle with my answer. How often must I fail at this before I learn to stop attempting it! Ugh…

  2. jas says:

    I haven’t had much inclination to check out “Stranger Things,” not only ’cause of your description, but also, horror is not my fav genre.

    “Full Monty” and “Lost Boys” both movies worth checking out.

    Tony–done with book! Huzzah! (send me a copy when you’re at the looking-for-feedback stage)

    Also, what are the novels you read on vacation?

    What Will said about our culture and Romance/Religion–It’s cause alienation is sort of this culture’s foundational symptom, yes? And these are two things offered as a cure, but of course, in the form in which they are offered, are not at all a cure, because there’s a reliance on keeping the symptom going (so more things can be promised, and so on, and so forth).

    I think those three things–care/wanting the happiness of the person/intimacy have to go together. If you just consider the first two without the intimacy, well, if I see some complete stranger suffering, I care about them and want them to be happy. Even people I don’t know and think I’d probably not like if I knew them–I still want good things to happen to that person ’cause I think, if good things happen to them there’s a chance they’ll become the kind of person I like. This is probably a very optimistic belief. 🙂

    So anyway, if intimacy is key, what’s your opinion of unrequited love? I actually don’t think it really describes love because if the other person doesn’t want an intimate relationship, then it’s really hard to describe it as “love.” It seems like something that’s more about the person who is feeling it, than about a relationship or connection.

    Getting back to culture for a sec, it seems to me that unrequited love is something that’s pretty central to the romance narrative. It’s all about the individual’s longing rather than about a relationship between two people.

    Maybe the more positive spin on that idea of unrequited love, is more like the part of love where one is trying to see the other person as a separate and whole being outside of oneself–as not being there to serve as some kind of answer to my feeling–that is especially to my alienation, or even to my existential aloneness. I think maybe that’s a fairly central part–’cause one actually can’t make that connection to another without first acknowledging their separateness.

    • William says:

      I take unrequited love to be a situation where one person is interested in a greater degree of intimacy in a relationship while the other person is satisfied with the level of intimacy just as it is (or perhaps they would prefer things to be less intimate). So, right, not really having to do with “love” per se.

      I don’t think the peddlers of toxic romance and religious narratives want people to think too hard about the key role of intimacy and the nuanced ways to understand it. They’d rather people focus on these vague and often paradoxically defined concepts of “love” and “God”, for all of the reasons you discuss. Looking too closely at intimacy will reveal too many truths about what make us human. And that kind of knowledge tends to make people not so easy to manipulate and control.

    • themagicaltalkinghat says:

      The books I read were Monster Hunter International, by Larry Correia. He’s the same guy who wrote the series I’m listening to on audiobook. And the other was the latest in a series I’m reading by M.R. Forbes. M.R. Forbes is a crazy prolific author of fantasy and sci-fi that I’m really developing an appreciation of. And I’ve discovered that he’s wholly self-published, and seems to be earning a living at it! So they’re also now a role-model.

      • jas says:

        Do you know the Dhampir series by Barb & JC Hendee? First several are good. It’s set in a medieval fantasy world and the main character is a woman who initially anyway is a con-artist pretending to be a vampire hunter.

        My fav fantasy books are by Patricia Briggs. Not the Urban fantasy stuff she’s doing now but older stuff like her Raven series, Dragon’s Blood/Dragon’s Bane series, and the Aralorn/Wolf series. Excellent world building and characters.

        • themagicaltalkinghat says:

          I think I’ve heard of the Dhampir series. The other author isn’t familiar.

          I’ll add them to the list. 🙂

  3. Stuart says:

    I heartily approve of the No Man’s Sky obsession. I’ve had to quite deliberately stop playing it so much, because a few minutes would evaporate and I’m still staring at the screen at midnight, which is rubbish when your kid wakes you up before 6 every day without fail.

    Not a complicated game, but I’m sure they’ll add to it. The sense of exploration is astonishing, however. Does make me wonder if I just need to grab the Skyrim re-master.

  4. Mark says:

    Playing Chicken with the Internet: Nah, I’m pretty sure the Internet has blinked by now.

    Lost Boys is probably the best vampire movie and nearly qualifies as being as a good movie in its own right. Or at least it did when I last watched it; but that’s been… a good long time.

    IA State Fair: I’ve not made it down for that in years but I keep thinking I should give it another go one of these days.

    William & Gaming: I think Michelle & I missed the session you’re talking about here but I’ve never thought you’ve done something at one of these gaming sessions that would be annoying people. Another point to consider, one can play characters that are annoying but the player isn’t.

    No Man’s Sky: The hype for that was amazing, but I’ve not heard much good about it since.

    FO4 Vault Building DLC: Meh, I didn’t care much for that one.

    Tomb Raider was absolutely amazing. I had a massively good time playing it. Michelle heard me raving about it enough that she started watching me play it; then for a while, it was something we’d do in the evenings.

    Stranger Things: I watched the first episode and stopped. Now, I did stop because thought it was something I’d like to watch with my wife but we’ve not gotten around to watching it. I did enjoy the nostalgia of the first episode.

    Tony’s first draft complete: Horray! 🙂

    The principal in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off was played by Jeffrey Jones.

    Cookie Clicker: Yup, actually been playing this in my spare time at the office, very curious about this Cookie Clicker clone with a story.

    Friends cleaning your house: We can sort of relate. This summer one of our neighbors decided to basically start a project of beautifying the neighborhood and they decided our yard needed a huge amount of work.

    Cats/Bathroom: Yup that’s true but it’s also why I normally close the door preventing them from coming in.

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